Wedding Planning: My 3 Biggest Tips for Future Married Couples

I’ll be the first to admit that I never thought I would need a wedding planner.

I’m an incredibly organised person. I love planning, organising and being involved in every little detail. Give me a spreadsheet, a timeline and a vision, and I’m in my element.

So naturally, when Joel and I first got engaged, I thought, I’ve got this!

And for a little while, I did.

But as time went on, life got busier. And when I say busier, I mean ridiculously busy.

Between completing the final subjects of my university degree, trying to make a Commonwealth Games team, planning the launch of my Kidman Collection, moving to Perth, Joel’s World Cup commitments and our Pro League tours, we were trying to plan a wedding while juggling some of the biggest moments of our careers and lives.

Suddenly, the time we had to sit down together, discuss ideas and actually enjoy the process was becoming almost nonexistent.

And that last part was really important to me.

From the very beginning, Joel had always said he wanted me to have my dream wedding. In his words, all he really cared about was seeing me at the end of the aisle.

Which, of course, is incredibly sweet.

But I didn’t want it to just be my dream wedding. I wanted it to be our wedding.

I wanted us both to feel involved, to make decisions together and to look around on the day knowing that everything reflected who we were as a couple.

I also didn’t want our limited time together to become consumed by wedding planning conversations, decisions and never-ending to-do lists.

And that’s where Alysia came in.

The woman who made it all happen

I genuinely don’t think I could ever put into words just how grateful we are for Alysia Bridger.

This incredible, kind-hearted, creative woman was one of the greatest blessings throughout our entire wedding journey. And not just because she created the most beautiful wedding day, but because she made the entire lead-up feel effortless. One of the things I appreciated most about Alysia was that she understood our lifestyle and how little spare time we actually had. She never overwhelmed us with constant messages, endless questions or decisions that needed to be made immediately. Instead, she took the time to understand our vision, our personalities and what mattered most to us. Then she went away and worked her magic.

We would have meetings where she would walk us through everything she had been organising, show us carefully selected options based on our previous conversations and highlight the few things she needed our feedback on. It meant Joel and I could sit down together, make those final decisions and then get straight back to everything else happening in our lives. There was no unnecessary back-and-forth, no constant stress and no feeling like we were falling behind. She simply had it under control. And for two people with incredibly demanding schedules, that was priceless.

Something that makes Alysia so special is her ability to think outside the box.

She doesn’t just take your inspiration photos and recreate them. She takes the feeling, the vision and the little details you’ve spoken about and turns them into something even better than you imagined.

Our vision was a timeless, elegant, black-and-white wedding inspired by Chanel.

We wanted something sophisticated and classic, but still with those beautiful statement moments that made it feel magical and uniquely ours.

And Alysia absolutely delivered.

In fact, we reached a point where we trusted her creativity so much that we quite literally told her, “Surprise us!”

For someone like me, who usually likes to know every single detail, that says a lot.

Of course, there were still elements we wanted to create ourselves, including our invitations, menus and thank-you favours. Those were little personal touches we loved being involved in.

But when it came to the overall styling, design and bringing everything together, we gave Alysia the freedom to do what she does best.

And WOW.

The little things that made the biggest difference

Beyond the styling, what really stood out to us was how Alysia consistently went above and beyond.

It was her attention to detail, her willingness to find solutions, her understanding of what we wanted before we could always explain it and the way she made us feel like everything was taken care of.

She also knew exactly which people to bring together to make our vision a reality.

The vendors she recommended and the team she assembled were incredible. Every element worked so beautifully together, and it was clear that there was so much thought behind every recommendation.

When you hire a wedding planner, you’re not just hiring someone to organise your day. You’re also gaining their experience, creative knowledge, industry relationships and ability to bring together people who are exceptional at what they do.

And that makes such a difference.

Being present was the greatest gift

The biggest thing Alysia gave us wasn’t the beautiful styling, the incredible ceremony trees or even the seamless organisation.

It was the ability to be completely present on our wedding day.

We walked into our wedding without worrying about where something needed to go, whether a vendor had arrived, if the timeline was running smoothly or whether we’d forgotten something. We didn’t have to think about any of it. We simply got to be there.

To take it all in. To laugh, cry, celebrate and enjoy every moment with the people we love.

That had been our goal from the very beginning, and Alysia made it possible.

If there’s one thing I would encourage couples to invest in, especially if you have busy lives, it’s someone who allows you to actually enjoy the experience rather than just survive the planning process. I cannot recommend Alysia highly enough.

This is probably the piece of advice I feel most strongly about. Your wedding day is about you and your partner. Everyone is there for you both. And while that sounds incredibly simple, putting it into practice is a whole different story. There are so many external pressures that come with planning a wedding. Family expectations, friends’ opinions, traditions, what people think is right or wrong, who should be invited, what people should wear, where you should get married… the list goes on.

Everyone has an opinion, and often those opinions come from a place of love.

But that doesn’t necessarily mean they’re right for you.

For Joel and me, learning to stand strong in what we wanted was honestly one of the toughest parts of wedding planning.

There were decisions that weren’t easy, conversations that were uncomfortable and moments where we knew not everyone would agree with our choices.

But whenever we found ourselves questioning something, we tried to come back to one simple thought:

Because at the end of the day, we wanted to look back with absolutely no regrets.

Yes, we asked everyone to wear black!

One of the decisions that sparked a few opinions was our dress code.

We asked all our guests to wear black formal attire. And yes, I even created a mood board on our wedding website so there was absolutely no confusion about the vision!

We wanted our entire wedding to feel timeless, elegant and cohesive, with a beautiful Chanel-inspired black-and-white aesthetic. Of course, not everyone immediately understood it.

I’m fairly certain the words “black is for a funeral” came up more than once!

But we loved the idea, and we stuck with it. What made this decision particularly special to us was that it wasn’t just about how the photos would look. Our wedding party was also dressed in black, and we loved the thought that when we were all together, whether in professional photos or those spontaneous moments captured by friends and family, everyone would look and feel part of the celebration. There wouldn’t be this huge visual separation between the wedding party and our guests. Everyone would blend beautifully together.

We couldn’t have every important person in our lives standing beside us at the altar, but everyone who was there had a special place in our story.

And we wanted them to feel that.

Looking back, seeing everyone dressed up and embracing the theme was one of my favourite details of the entire day. So my advice? If there’s something you absolutely love, don’t let someone else’s opinion make you second-guess it.

The guest list: Probably our hardest decision

Now, let’s talk about something that I think almost every couple struggles with.

The guest list.

Oh my goodness.

When we first sat down and wrote out everyone we would love to invite, our list came to approximately 150 people. The problem? Our original wedding budget was based on 80 guests. That’s 70 people we somehow needed to reconsider. And let me tell you, it was not easy. We went back and forth so many times, questioning who we could invite, who we couldn’t, who would understand and who might be upset. There were people we loved, people who had been part of our lives growing up, family friends and people who had supported our families over the years. How do you possibly narrow that down?

Eventually, Joel and I decided we needed to stop thinking about who we should invite and start thinking about who we truly wanted beside us on one of the most meaningful days of our lives.

We came up with two questions that helped guide every decision.

These questions changed everything. And I know not everyone will agree with that approach.

But for us, it felt right. We wanted to look around the room and personally know every single person there, not just as individuals, but as a couple. We wanted to feel that everyone was celebrating us, our relationship and the life we were building together.

That doesn’t mean we don’t love or appreciate the people who weren’t invited.

There are so many people who have played important roles in our lives, supported us growing up and been there for our families. And we will continue to celebrate birthdays, milestones and future family gatherings with them. But our wedding day was one day.

One incredibly special day that we wanted to share with the people who were most closely part of our journey together. And I truly believe that’s what made the atmosphere so special.

The guest list maths didn’t quite go to plan!

After many discussions, we eventually settled on inviting 100 people. Now, we’d been told by so many previously married couples that you should expect around 20% of your guests to decline. Perfect, we thought! Invite 100, approximately 20 can’t make it, and we’d end up with our ideal 80-person wedding. Well… apparently we chose our guest list a little too well!

We received 98 YES responses. NINETY-EIGHT! We were obviously so grateful that almost everyone wanted to be there, but we definitely had to laugh at our very optimistic calculations.

As life happens, we did have four last-minute cancellations, but we still ended up with a much bigger guest count than originally planned. So here’s another little piece of advice: Don’t build your budget around the assumption that people won’t come.

If you invite 100 people, be prepared for 100 people to say yes. Trust me on that one!

You can’t please everyone, and that’s okay

I think one of the hardest things about wedding planning is accepting that some people might be disappointed by your decisions. And if you’re someone who naturally wants to make everyone happy, that can be really difficult. But you can spend so much time trying to accommodate everyone else’s expectations that you slowly lose sight of what you and your partner actually wanted in the first place.

There will always be someone who would have done something differently. A different venue, a different dress code, a different guest list or a different way of celebrating. But they aren’t the ones getting married.

You are.

So listen to advice, appreciate the people who care about you, but make your final decisions together. Because when the day arrives, you want to walk into that room knowing it reflects the two of you. And I promise, that feeling is worth the uncomfortable conversations along the way.

This was another big decision for us, and one I think couples should have a conversation about early in the planning process. When you’re working within a budget, something usually has to give. And sometimes that means choosing between having the wedding you’ve always envisioned or having a bigger celebration with more people. Neither option is wrong.

But understanding what matters most to you as a couple is so important.

Falling in love with The Valley Estate

For me, the dream venue was always a huge part of the wedding vision.

I wanted somewhere that felt romantic, elegant, timeless and beautiful in every little detail.

And when it came to The Valley Estate, it had everything I had imagined.

It wasn’t just one particular feature that made me fall in love with it. It was the entire experience, the atmosphere, the architecture and all those little details that made it feel so special.

It was the kind of venue that didn’t need to be completely transformed to become beautiful. The beauty was already there. Of course, choosing a venue like that came with some decisions. We knew that, within our budget, getting married at The Valley Estate would mean having fewer guests than we could have invited elsewhere. And we absolutely considered other venues.

There were some incredibly beautiful options that would have allowed us to accommodate more people, keep costs down and create more of a big-party atmosphere. But whenever we compared them, we kept coming back to The Valley Estate. Other venues offered more flexibility with guest numbers, but they didn’t quite have all the details and the overall feeling that we loved so much.

We had to ask ourselves: Would we rather have more people at a venue we liked, or fewer people at the venue we absolutely loved?

For us, the answer became clear. We wanted the dream wedding. And that meant making some sacrifices elsewhere.

The 10:30 pm finish… which was actually perfect for us!

Something else that came with choosing The Valley Estate was the finishing time.

Due to local council requirements, our celebrations needed to finish by 10:30 pm.

Other venues, particularly those in more remote locations, could offer celebrations running until midnight. For some couples, that would be a major consideration. But for us?

Honestly, 10:30 pm was perfect!

Anyone who knows me knows that my social battery generally starts running low around 9 pm. And on a normal night, I’m quite happily in bed by 8:30 pm. I love a celebration, but I also love my sleep! So the idea of having this incredible, full day of celebrations and finishing at 10:30 pm actually suited us really well.

And the funniest part?

After our ceremony, while we were waiting to make our entrance into the reception, Joel and I managed to sneak away and sit down together for a little chat. It was one of the first quiet moments we’d had to ourselves all day. We looked at each other and both admitted how absolutely exhausted we already were. We checked the time.

It was only 5:30 pm!

We hadn’t even officially started the reception, and we were already wondering how we were going to make it through the rest of the night. We couldn’t stop laughing. It was such a funny little moment, but also one of my favourite memories because it was just the two of us, finally sitting down together and taking in everything that had happened.

And looking back, I think it perfectly sums up why the 10:30 pm finish was so right for us.

We didn’t need to party until midnight to have the most incredible wedding. We just needed a day that felt like us.

Spend your budget on what matters to you

One of the biggest lessons I learnt is that your wedding budget should reflect your priorities, not what you think a wedding is supposed to look like. For some couples, having 200 of their favourite people together on a dance floor until midnight is the dream.

For others, it’s an intimate celebration, incredible styling, a beautiful venue and those special little details that make the whole day feel magical. Some couples would rather spend more on photography, entertainment, food or their honeymoon.

And that’s the beauty of it. There is no one-size-fits-all wedding. But when you try to have absolutely everything, that’s when the budget can quickly become overwhelming.

For Joel and me, we knew that the venue, the styling, the atmosphere and the overall experience were incredibly important.

We wanted to walk into our wedding and feel like we were living in our own little fairytale.

And we did. Would it have been lovely to invite every single person we knew? Of course.

But would we have traded the wedding we created just to have a bigger guest list?

Absolutely not. The day was everything we had dreamed of, and more.

And I think that’s because we were really intentional about what mattered most to us.

If there’s one thing I hope you take away from this, it’s that your wedding should feel like an extension of your relationship. Not a performance. Not a day designed to meet everyone else’s expectations. And definitely not something that leaves you so stressed that you forget to enjoy it.

For Joel and I, our wedding was never about having the biggest guest list, the latest finishing time or doing everything the way people expected us to. It was about creating a day that reflected who we are, surrounded by people who genuinely love and support us.

It was about the little details that made us smile, the incredible people who helped bring our vision to life and those moments where we could look at each other and think, We actually did it. We’re married!

So if you’re currently planning your wedding, here are the three things I want you to remember.

And perhaps one final little bonus tip…

Make time for each other throughout the process.

Because amongst all the planning, decisions, spreadsheets, guest lists and excitement, it’s easy to forget that the whole reason you’re doing this is because you’ve found the person you want to spend your life with.

And as much as I adored every little detail of our wedding, my favourite part will always be the fact that I got to marry Joel.

Everything else was just the most beautiful bonus.

With love,

The very happily married Mrs. Rintala